When you Marry

In this broshure you will find the summary of the Jewish approach to questions of marriage and family

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Introduction 5
Intervention parents 8
"In an era of maturity ... " 15
Torah study and marriage 24
Courtship 27
The position of the couple 31
Married, think things through and seek advice 43
Economic issues 49
On correspondences married 54
Marriage in our time 58

INTRODUCTION

An important and difficult decision

Getting married - conventional and legalized by Jews ( and other peoples ), the action in order to create a new family. A man and a woman enter into an alliance to jointly produce life in the hope of sons and daughters, and bring them happy and proud Jews , useful and loyal to his people * .

But all of the above - only part of the broader concept - marry. Everyone should be clear that the decision to get married - one of the most important decisions that a person takes throughout his life , and perhaps one of the most difficult . It is important, because to a large extent determines its future success or failure in life for thirty or forty or fifty years or more. This is a very difficult decision , because familiarity between doctors usually quite limited . Even if the bride and groom know each other a few months or even a year or more, it is difficult to predict how each will behave in the new conditions of family life , very different from the previous ones. Who is to say that in the future , each party will always be happy with your partner, as in the day of the marriage union? ..

motivating factors

What are the causes which impel people to marry ? Here are some of them:
1) The mutual love.
2) The desire to have children , the desire for parenthood .
3) The social conditions and public opinion , requirements ,
imposed on the young generation about starting a family and the continuation of the human race and the Jewish people.
4) The desire to fulfill the Biblical commandment - " Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth" ( Genesis 9 , 1).
5 ) The fear of loneliness and the associated social
and economic difficulties.
6) The desire for a specific position in society, to honor, respect and a good life , which is unattainable , if not their "home" - his family.

questions

1) Would you agree that the above factors
promote and create the wedding of your family?
2) If you do not agree which of them do you think should be deleted , and what to add?
3 ) Place all of the factors according to their importance , starting with the most important and decisive .
4) It is possible that some of the factors that you think are very important , but not warranted and is not valid . Arrange all of the factors listed above, in order of their " justification " and " justice " , starting with the principal. You can also make notes of " unjustified " or " wrong " in those cases where you think so .
5 ) Why is the basis of what considerations do you consider one of the factors of the previous section with the most reasonable and it began to list ?

As the issues of family and marriage in the Torah occupy a very important position , they are given a lot of attention in Judaism . In this area of life operates many of the laws , customs , and traditions. We 'll talk about it in the next section .


* The ritual of marriage , according to the requirements of the Torah , as follows: a marriage contract drawn up in which the groom (her husband ) undertakes to support his wife . In the event of death or divorce, she should be paid a certain amount (other than child support ) . This contract is called the " Ketubah " . It is given statutory force signatures of two witnesses - believing Jews and of the groom. After this the groom sends " Ketubah " witnesses , and those - the bride.

The second part of the ceremony - " hoop " . The groom stands to the left of the bride under the marriage canopy. It symbolizes the bride to the groom's house .

The third part of the wedding - " kiddushin " ( sanctification) . The groom puts on the middle finger of his right hand the bride's wedding ring. The fact that the bride does not resist putting on rings, indicating its consent to marry. The meaning of putting the ring that symbolized the groom buys the bride. At the same time fiance says formula: " With this ring you are consecrated to me according to the law of Moses and Israel." The meaning of sanctification - " kiduship " - that now belongs only to the bride to her husband and her relationship with another man is forbidden.

In those places where the author uses the word " sanctify " , I mean the whole complex of marriage ( Editor's note ) .